[INDEED. the difference is just that Magolor is all too willing to be whiny about it to Lan Wangji's face. he is whining right now! and lifting up more to cling to his arm lightly]
I hate when you're mad at me! But you're also allowed to be mad at me. It's so annoying that both of them are true, but that's how it is!
[It's a question because he has to actually think about it seriously. Sigh! But he does that, because it is worth it.]
Obviously, I want everything to magically be okay, and you aren't mad at me for anything I do, and you and Wei Wuxian both feel better about things and live happily here, even if you don't work things out at all with Jiang Wanyin. But that's not a real answer! That's like wishing to be fabulously wealthy, right? So, for real? I do want you to feel better about things and live happily here. And I want you to still love me even if you're mad at me for deciding to talk to him again. And I want to make you feel better, but I don't really know how.
Well, he did whip me and kick me across a stadium, so if you want to speak a little bit ill of him, be my guest. Er, but seriously, I know that's nothing compared to your history...I'm sorry. I really am sorry.
[LAN WANGJI'S HAND CLOSED INTO A FIST AT "HE DID WHIP ME" AND A BRANCH ON A TREE IN THE NEIGHBORING YARD CRACKED OFF LOUDLY AND LIKE, FELL TO THE GROUND SADLY AFTER A MINUTE]
Magolor actually does jump a little in surprise and cling harder for a moment.]
I did block it! Just saying. I wasn't hurt. Ergh...I knew that would make you mad, but it wasn't satisfying at all, even if I'm flattered you care for me that much...instead I just feel bad for making you angrier.
[IS THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, disliking seeing his loved ones having negative emotions even if they're flattering to Magolor personally?! How can this have happened to a bad egg! Ugh!]
I see...it's a bad position you're in. People you care for are making decisions that might be bad for them, for the sake of someone who doesn't deserve that. Of course you're angry.
[he just kind of, breathes for a minute, getting his temper under control... yeesh it's been a long time since he's done something like that, honestly. slowly relaxes his hand]
If I ever really need to, I promise I can and will make him regret picking a fight with me. I don't like doing it! Especially not to a loved one's brother! But he is just a human, after all.
Right . . . so I did. I remember the whole thing. A dream like that isn't easy to forget. Back then, things between them seemed complicated, but I knew there was love there. I didn't realize, er . . . you know.
...But he still brought their sister for a secret visit, and suggested to her that Wei Wuxian should give her son his courtesy name.
[god. could it be that all of this is really stupid? that politics and family shit are fraught and terrible? social species have it so rough. he's beginning to understand both more and less about the brothers.]
[he turns this over, and leans back against Lan Wangji even though he's not being held. then he sighs lightly]
I think I've known you pretty well for a while now, but with all of this drama, I think I understand you even better . . . him too. I didn't know him, but I'm starting to! All of these makes some things pretty clear about why you'll never see eye to eye. Hey . . . do you remember telling me once that you thought I'd be better off with some understanding of duty? The kind I've never really had to have, with the life I've led.
[he puts a hand on Magolor's head again. he is kind of mad and hurt and confused right now, but in the end Magolor always tries to understand him, and he is a very good friend :(]
I still can't say I understand it much...maybe a little better than before. I do feel I have a duty to this world! But I chose that out of love. It wasn't given to me or anything like that. I can't imagine what that's like.
[he reaches up to touch that hand, lingering there, very gently.]
Anyway, I'd say you understand duty well enough to know how to balance it with the rest of your life. That's my impression of you. It's definitely not my impression of him.
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[INDEED. the difference is just that Magolor is all too willing to be whiny about it to Lan Wangji's face. he is whining right now! and lifting up more to cling to his arm lightly]
I hate when you're mad at me! But you're also allowed to be mad at me. It's so annoying that both of them are true, but that's how it is!
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...
What do you want?
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[It's a question because he has to actually think about it seriously. Sigh! But he does that, because it is worth it.]
Obviously, I want everything to magically be okay, and you aren't mad at me for anything I do, and you and Wei Wuxian both feel better about things and live happily here, even if you don't work things out at all with Jiang Wanyin. But that's not a real answer! That's like wishing to be fabulously wealthy, right? So, for real? I do want you to feel better about things and live happily here. And I want you to still love me even if you're mad at me for deciding to talk to him again. And I want to make you feel better, but I don't really know how.
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closes his eyes and exhales...]
...
My affection has not diminished.
I will not speak ill of others you have chosen to befriend.
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He had best consider his actions.
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Magolor actually does jump a little in surprise and cling harder for a moment.]
I did block it! Just saying. I wasn't hurt. Ergh...I knew that would make you mad, but it wasn't satisfying at all, even if I'm flattered you care for me that much...instead I just feel bad for making you angrier.
[IS THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, disliking seeing his loved ones having negative emotions even if they're flattering to Magolor personally?! How can this have happened to a bad egg! Ugh!]
I see...it's a bad position you're in. People you care for are making decisions that might be bad for them, for the sake of someone who doesn't deserve that. Of course you're angry.
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...
My response was intemperate.
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[aren't you tired of being nice. don't you just want to go ape shit]
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If you are injured, do not hesitate.
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...
That is so.
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[he tentatively moves to settle back into Lan Wangji's lap.]
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Your dream. Meeting Jiang Wanyin's memory.
Do you recall the circumstances?
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Jiang Wanyin and Jiang Yanli met with Wei Wuxian. She wore her wedding attire. He could not be invited.
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[everything. everything after.]
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[god. could it be that all of this is really stupid? that politics and family shit are fraught and terrible? social species have it so rough. he's beginning to understand both more and less about the brothers.]
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When he served their goals, he was lauded.
When he threatened their authority, he was feared.
Jiang Wanyin followed this. No loyalty repaid.
Some would call it wise.
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I think I've known you pretty well for a while now, but with all of this drama, I think I understand you even better . . . him too. I didn't know him, but I'm starting to! All of these makes some things pretty clear about why you'll never see eye to eye. Hey . . . do you remember telling me once that you thought I'd be better off with some understanding of duty? The kind I've never really had to have, with the life I've led.
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Mm.
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[he reaches up to touch that hand, lingering there, very gently.]
Anyway, I'd say you understand duty well enough to know how to balance it with the rest of your life. That's my impression of you. It's definitely not my impression of him.
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Not so different. Was born to my Sect and clan. But I want it.
Reasons are not excuses.
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